Step 4: Actions speak louder.
What have they done to show you they sincerely regret cheating on you?
Task: Write down your answers to the following questions.
- Have they told that person they cheated you with that it’s over?
- Have they blocked their number and removed them from all of their social media accounts?
- Is your partner sad about cheating on you or sad about breaking up with that person?
- What have they done to show you proof that they will have nothing to do with that person ever again?
Step 5: Broken mirror situation.
Once you’ve got step 1-4 sorted, sit down and talk with your partner about the broken trust in your relationship.
Make them understand that you have a broken mirror situation here.
You can fix and keep the mirror, but it may not be the same again.
Make your partner realize that you will have trust issues from time to time.
You may be curious to see their Whatsapp conversations randomly.
You may stalk their Facebook profile.
You may often become paranoid about their activities.
It will be quite ugly for some time.
It may take months or years before you can fully start trusting this person again.
Tell them that and ask them if it’s something they’re willing to deal with as well.
Are they willing to tolerate your paranoid behaviors and work on proving to you that they will never break your trust again?
Step 6: Think about what went wrong.
No, your partner shouldn’t have cheated on you no matter what.
There are no right reasons to cheat.
However, think about what could have led them to that temptation to cheat.
If you’re a married couple who’s both healthy enough to have regular sex, think about if you’ve been depriving your partner for too long.
Have you been too busy to make love with your husband or wife?
Have you disrespected or hurt your partner’s feelings a lot?
Nothing justifies infidelity.
However, being the bigger person and thinking about anything that could’ve gone wrong from your side can help you fix your relationship better.
Step 7: Think recreational.
If you’ve taken care of all the steps above, it’s time to think about doing things that will help you bond with your partner again.
Sitting on the couch with a cup of coffee or hot chocolate and watching your all-time favorite movie is a great idea.
But going outdoors and doing things that you both enjoy will help reignite that lost spark in your relationship.
Think weekend getaways, watching a movie at cinemas, theme park, beach, and anything you guys will enjoy.
It won’t help reverse everything overnight.
However, it will help you both to relax your mind and reduce the stress what’s happened in your relationship.
It will help bring back the friendship and bonding you had with your husband or wife.
Step 8: Small Appreciations
Last but not least, although you have every right to be upset and have trust issues after being cheated on, do not allow it to continue to suck out all the positive energy from your relationship.
If and when you see a steady improvement in your partner’s character and contribution towards your relationship, let them know you appreciate it.
Let them know you appreciate their efforts.
It doesn’t necessarily have to be in words because actions speak louder.
Perhaps you can cook a nice meal for your husband or wife or send them a sweet text when they’re at work.
NOTE: Only do this after you see continued improvement your partner’s behavior for at least 3-6 months.
Speak Your Mind!
What’s your experience and tips on how to get over being cheated on and stay together?